What is Counselling?

The terms advice, guidance and counselling are often interchanged by most people, including me. I would never have thought that there was a huge difference between the words: Advice, guidance and counselling, till I read about them. While they all are processes which are evolved to provide a solution to a problem in a person’s life, it is important to understand the difference between them. What I discovered was very interesting.

 

Advice

Advice is what I would try and do when I’m trying to coax someone into doing what in my perception is right. When one gives advice, it may be followed or not. A person usually means well when they give advice. It isn’t mandatory. If I don’t know the complete facts, advice could be harmful, isn’t it? Every story has two side, doesn’t it? Is this huge responsibility something I want to shoulder is the question I have to ask myself. It can affect someone’s life, positively or negatively. It isn’t about making the person feel good. It is about doing what’s right.

 

Guidance

Guidance I realised is again a one way street, just like advice. There could be a situation where I am influencing a person to make a wrong decision. Guidance is more about telling a person how to do things in clear words. Guide them through something towards a particular direction. Guidance is a more external process, helps a person know alternative solutions available across him and makes him appreciate his personality and assist him to select the right solution. Its like an instruction I would be giving. Why? Because I have a certain perception of the situation on the basis of what I have been told, in my mind? But then again this could go the wrong way.

 

Counselling

Counselling actively involves the thoughts and ideas of the person concerned and gives us both a chance to explore choices on the basis of which a conclusion can be reached for the benefit of the person concerned. There are conscious discussions and decisions which help a person to come to his / her own conclusion, with my help of actively assisting in weighing all the possibilities. Counselling is a more internal process, where the person can introspect himself/ herself.

 

We all have our own perceptions of how we view the world. Each person’s reality is held in place with our current state of awareness. I understand that it would be my job to empathize. How can I do that? I have to put myself in that person’s shoes and try to understand the situation to my best ability. No questions asked. I may not agree with what that person’s views or opinions, but that’s not what I’m here to do. I’m not here to think and feel what I do. I am here to see, understand and feel what that person does. My personal feeling have to be kept aside. When I will do that, I will be able to empathize.

 

Is there anything more that need to understand about this before I dive into the course of staying on course? Have I missed something out in my understanding of the process? Please feel free to add comments which you may feel will help me in my endeavour.