Suicide Prevention

Although the world is full of suffering, it is also full of the overcoming of it  ~ Unknown 

 

Suicide is not chosen; it happens when pain exceeds resources for coping with pain. If you spot the warning signs of suicide in someone you care about, you may wonder if it’s a good idea to say anything. What if you’re wrong? What if the person gets angry? In such situations, it's natural to feel uncomfortable or afraid. But anyone who talks about suicide or shows other warning signs needs immediate help—the sooner the better. Talking to a friend or family member about their suicidal thoughts and feelings can be extremely difficult for anyone. But if you're unsure whether someone is suicidal, the best way to find out is to ask. You can't make a person suicidal by showing that you care. In fact, giving a suicidal person the opportunity to express his or her feelings can provide relief from loneliness and pent-up negative feelings, and may prevent a suicide attempt. Teenage suicide is a serious and growing problem. The teenage years can be emotionally turbulent and stressful. Teenagers face pressures to succeed and fit in. They may struggle with self-esteem issues, self-doubt, and feelings of alienation. For some, this leads to suicide. Depression is also a major risk factor for teen suicide. The highest suicide rates of any age group occur among persons aged 65 years and older. One contributing factor is depression in the elderly that is undiagnosed and untreated. There are 2 broad ways of helping a person who wants to commit suicide. 1. Finding a way to help reduce the pain and 2. Finding a way to help  increase his/ her coping resources. Below are some of the important things a counsellor must always remember and do while relating with such people.

 

1. Establish a relationship of confidentiality. Inspire confidence. Depressed people often feel they are disclosing a terrible aspect of themselves and afraid people might take advantage of them. They do tell neighbours, family and friends.
2. Understand their despair. Have compassion.
3. The depressed person needs to know he/ she is accepted. As a counsellor, recognize the symptoms. The person sometimes may be critical and demanding, so avoid the tendency to feel hurt by the rejection or criticism of the depressed person.
4. Help the person understand their own symptoms of depression. It will help reduce the pressure they put on themselves.
5. Help provide structure in their life. Avoiding and denying their problems and pulling back from the world are destructive attitudes. Structure helps a person function in the real world and distracts them from their obsessive feelings. You can help provide structure by telling them to plan outings with their friends, doing volunteer work, cultivating hobbies and recreation activities, daily exercise. Please remember, structure is the last thing a depressed person wants, he/ she will require considerable encouragement and direction.
6. Offer a sense of hope. One of the symptoms a depressed person experiences is difficulty in making decisions and seeing the world clearly. Anxiety has a constricting quality. It produces a sort of emotional tunnel vision making it difficult to see solutions to problems.
7. Depressed people should be with others as much as possible. Isolated people tend to become self-centered and do not benefit from the give and take of social interaction.

 

Be careful with the words you use with a depressed person. Expressions such as – “Come on cheer up” , “ you have so many good things going for you, you don’t need to feel down”, “ everyone feels this way once in a while” etc. must definitely be avoided. They will not help the situation and in fact worsen it by reminding the client that he/ she is being selfish or “not real” in the way they are thinking and create a lot of guilt.  It is useful to listen in a manner that shows appreciation of the person's difficulties. This does not mean entering into the despair; an attitude of careful optimism is appropriate. Depressed individuals are very often wrapped up in their own concerns; advice should be simple and practical, and may have to be repeated. When there is a threat or real possibility of suicide, it is important to stay close to the individual until professional help is obtained. Change can be slow. Putting out energy and getting no response can be frustrating. People in a helping role should try to make sure their own needs are being met. Too high a level of frustration can lead to anger and a sudden decision to withdraw. It is a good idea to seek assistance well before this point is reached. Suicidal individuals often try to convince others that the "worst" thing would be to let anyone know of their plight. Friends put in this position should consider the possible consequences of failing to obtain professional help. It is a sign of caring to bring a person to treatment that may alleviate suffering and save a life. Please add in any suggestions you feel may be helpful to this topic.